life in the garden

the garden is a good place for me to be. there's nothing better on this planet to eat than anything fresh off the plant, or out of the soil. to live off the earth is to thrive.. that's the way i see it anyways. it's been a challenge in itself to adapt to a more stationary lifestyle, it's always been a part of my program not to settle, to be always on the move.

but staying in one place has certainly paid off. foraging is a healthy habit, but nothing can beat growing your own food, and i wanted to have a place i call home where i do it. urban farming, right here in the city. just as i learned a lot from this past year of self observation, i learned what to do to adapt my gardening habits to my semi-vagabondish tendencies. my travel habit had some ill effects on the garden this year, but this prepares me for how to avoid such issues next season. the state of the garden and that of my health go hand in hand.

a healthful bounty. i am learning to grow. and with the wisdom of each attempted garden plot i move forward next season with many dreams and ideas. ones that shall grow into fruition. the colours of the bounty are inspiration enough, but the taste is worth living for. over the winter i shall continue to design, the garden and my life, so that when the sun returns i am ready to receive it.

20thirteen

i suppose when i started this blog i had this idea in my head that if i kept tabs on myself here, it'd motivate me more than ever to find my health. i wasn't wrong, i guess i just thought it would happen faster. at least it's happening.. i've only lost a few pounds this year, i think weight loss was the expectation that makes me feel like i haven't gotten anywhere. truly though, i have. as if to apply permaculture principles to my own health, i had to take the time to observe, to truly see myself and what it is i do that keeps me in a state of dis-ease. genetic predisposition is only a small part of it. it is completely possible to live a healthy life, it just requires a little more care than for those un-predisposed.

stress does some incredible things to the body. it can show in countless physical symptoms, it can keep you fat [or make you lose weight], it can make you sick [even so far as to create ulcers], and it can most certainly mess up your sleep cycle. after this long, fully encompassing observation period, i have come to realize that the stresses i have put myself under in my everyday life most likely has a lot to do with why i have a hard time staying healthy.

now that doesn't mean i'm going to stop doing everything i'm doing because it all creates stress, it simply means that i have to find ways of alleviating that stress, or not experience a stress response to my daily life in the first place. attitude is key. now that i am aware of the unnecessary emotional hells i have put myself through due to situations in or beyond my control, i can stop myself before i let things affect me negatively. instead of getting upset about something right away i remember to breathe. the trick is that usually after three deep, calm breaths the stress response will start to dissipate quickly. getting angry, upset or stressed out is never a good way for me to deal with things.

i feel like i'm finally beginning to get all of my ducks into a row. i know what helps and doesn't help, what i can handle and what i can't, and how to push myself. i had all year to see what works for me, and a chance to work through accepting what does not. i have collected all of the tools that i need to have a better diet, and have been slowly introducing them forming habits and rituals. this is key to building a healthier lifestyle. trends are bad, they fade.. but habits, even healthy ones are hard to break. and rituals... now that is just sacred. life is sacred. i'll do my best to make a ritual of everything.

interrupted.

routines and rituals are very important to me. i should try and make a ritual of writing, maybe i'd do it more often.. anyways, i've been living a domesticated lifestyle this year more so than probably any year of my life, and i had thought that building a routine would be easy. i guess it's not as easy as i thought it'd be.. any major interruption and i'm screwed.

 along with living a domesticated lifestyle, i've also been doing more traveling than i'm used to, and each time i leave for any decent amount of time, my routine goes straight out the window. i was doing so well for so long, and then arkansas happened. after recovering from that insane week of barely eating, not sleeping and riding four airplanes, i pulled myself for long enough to regain my healthy habits just in time to get on a bus for the east coast.

the journey east may have done more good for me than i give it credit for, it was a true awakening. i got to remember all of the healthy habits that came naturally living out there like taking better care when preparing meals.. taking my time. the journey did encourage me to bring my juicer back out of storage, and reminded me of the importance of bringing my own food to work instead of trying to find something suitable to purchase. that being said, this particular journey wasn't all bad for my health, except for of course spending a total of four days straight on a bus. that can be rough on the digestive system no matter who you are.

the most recent attack on my daily routine has been flipping to the midnight shift. i was just starting to pull myself together again from all that bussing when i was asked to destroy all that was left of the routine that i had to prepare my store for inventory. yuck.. overnights. talk about torture on my guts.. two more weeks to go until i can begin to recover once again, though i am doing all that i can to keep up with it. at least i have more time to work out on this schedule, one more routine piece i can take back to days with me and add to what i have been building on.

one more attack on my routine in a few weeks, i fly out to the dominican for a week to shoot a wedding. all of my meals are included, so here's hoping the resort has a decent vegetarian selection. what i should be doing is building a strategy on how to deal with interruptions to my routine, so that will be my focus for next year's lineup of traveling. this year i've had the opportunity to make a lot of observation. of my self, my environment and lifestyle, and also do some independent research.

good health is something you have to truly want to achieve. once you want it bad enough, doing what needs to be done to achieve that health becomes a part of your nature. it's not an easy transition but with the right support, it can be done. i'm thankful that i have friends to keep pushing me in the right direction, no matter how many times i fall. i've started to get impossible digestion issues under control, and get my energy back that an autoimmune disorder has been stealing from me all my life. now that i'm closer to having a good balance than i ever have been, i can begin to take it to the next level. really push myself.. lose some real weight, build some real muscle, and wake up. i've been too tired for far too long.

finding strength.

i never gave up so to speak.. but i have been discouraged. the weight that i lost in the beginning of the year ended up mostly coming back, though i must be patient because i am building muscle as i work out. it's hard to forget about the numbers sometimes, especially when they've been so high for so long.

there's no scale in my house anymore, but i do check when i go to the local health food store. they have a selection of digital scales available for customer use. i stepped on and said 'yes! 193!'. the manager did a double take and asked 'how much?!' apparently she was in disbelief that i weighed that much. 'well you carry it very, very well dear' she says. i'm sure i'd be 20 pounds lighter if i wasn't endowed with so much weight on my chest.

i've managed to stay on top of my morning routine of blending up a booster smoothie first thing to get me going, and taking the natural supplements designed to support my sluggish thyroid. that finicky little gland is partially responsible for this mess, even when i eat right and get exercise it's terribly hard to keep the weight off. the fact that my weight has gone down a few pounds this year instead of up several is a miracle, and also a motivation. i have gained on average 7 pounds a year since high school, no matter what i did to fight it. well now i'm taking it to the next level, and slowly changing my entire lifestyle to reflect the good health i wish to experience. health isn't something you make time for occasionally, it is your daily life.

it's been rough keeping up with working out, monitoring everything i eat, and managing to get done in a day everything i need to do. having a bunk thyroid zaps the energy right out of you and once inertia sets in it's hard to get back on track and into motion. i just have to find the strength to get back on my feet even when i'd rather take a nap, and push myself to keep moving. finally, it's starting to pay off.

there's only four months left to this year, and honestly i thought i would have made more progress by now. i'm not disappointed though, because there's only four months left to this year, and even though i haven't made the progress i thought i might, i'm still trying. one day at a time..

building healthy habits.

so i haven't posted all month, but i have managed to build a pretty solid morning routine. ever since i got my brand new NutriBullet i have made it a habit to make myself a 'fast food breakfast'. i use Salba chia as a boost, sometimes some hemp protein. i have to get more into adding greens though, at least i have the motion down pat.

another thing i am working on is trying to re-eliminate meat from my diet. i was doing so well and i started eating meat again when i got back to traveling. i'm so bad for that.. i have to learn to maintain healthy habits when i travel, or some up with alternatives and plan ahead.

i have found some inspiration in the world of reads that has challenged me to look deeper into what i eat, at the same time thinking of the big picture. if you want some motivation to truly change your diet [and your life!] i highly reccomend the book Whole by T. Colin Campbell. he is very blunt, and a veteran in nutritional science. besides longing for the health of my youth, this has been a driving force for me to succeed in this challenge.

i have found comfort in things like mushrooms and potatoes, and my boosts like chia and hemp. i also do my best to always have water on hand, i use a brita filter water bottle instead of drinking straight from the tap or wasting plastic drinking bottled water. i don't even enjoy the taste of bottled water, all i taste is the plastic it's packaged in.

that's it for now, otherwise i've been pretty occupied with the Permaculture style food garden, especially since being slammed with a pretty intense storm. lots of work needed to be done to get the garden back up off of the ground, and there's still more yet to do. i must be conscious of the heat though, and staying hydrated during the annual heat wave.

fast food breakfast

now when i say fast food, i don't mean a mcmuffin and a coffee.. i mean real, fast, food! as long as i have had a home/kitchen i have had a magic bullet in it, i swear by this little blender for providing fast liquid meals. my brand new toy, the NutriBullet is the same idea with twice the power!

in just a couple of minutes you can peel a banana, add a handful of fresh or frozen berries, and a 'boost'.. i tend to use Salba brand chia seeds, or some hemp protein powder, or both. for a green start, begin with a handful of kale pulled away from the spine, and blend with half a cup of juice or water to create a green 'base' to add the rest of your ingredients to. it's important to have enough liquid for your blender to work properly, so i try to use something delicious and healthy like coconut water, almond milk or pure orange juice.

there are a bazillion and a half smoothie recipes out there, for all kinds of tastes and diets and meals. for a more filling smoothie today i let some oats soak in some almond milk for half an hour before blending it in to the smoothie. this made for a super thick smoothie with added grains that will keep me full half of the day. the point is, smoothies are fast, and can be both healthy and delicious, and are a much wiser choice to start the day than waffles or a bowl of sugar cereal. i'm doing my best to incorporate a nice smooth meal once or twice a day to get all the nutrients and energy i need to keep up with the gardening and exercise, so far so good!

off the wagon

so i fell off it, that week i went away to Arkansas.. as i wrote in my last post, i had a hard time keeping up with my healthy habits and supplements. i threw off my routine all together, and now i'm starting over from scratch. not entirely i suppose, at least i have the tools i need to help me, i just need the willpower to get myself back on track.

i think i may have found help.. i have been hired to shoot a wedding in the Dominican sometime in October.. and i'm gonna want to look good. it's almost exactly 4 months away, so this is plenty of time to get in shape, if i can stick with it. at least i haven't neglected the garden...

at least something is thriving! i got back on my equalizer bars for the first time today in a couple weeks. i can feel the burn.. like i started over. being away meant that i didn't have as many fresh options, and i got too used to packaged snacks and not preparing my own meals. i was spoiled! but i can certainly feel that too. my guts are still recovering from eating too much processed food. i will have to remember this for the next time i travel, sticking with the routine no matter where i am is important! how did i stay in such great shape when i spent months on the road?! ahh... i'm getting older.

well i think it's just about time to bust out the juicer, or maybe the blender.. haven't decided yet. so many good things, farmer's market freshness.. i'm happy to be home <3